I was glad I spoke Spanish because the English version was not nearly as detailed or understandable. Another difference was the lack of a ban on smoking. Cigarette smoke quickly filled the cabin as passengers and crew lit up. We were soon in the air. As the wheels lifted off, I felt my last contact with the free world lost. When we touched down, it would be on Cuban soil. I watched the coastline of Mexico pass below. Ahead was water, and Communism. On the plane, I drank a Cuban Tucola, realizing I would not see a Coca-Cola until I returned to Mexico. If I returned to Mexico, I reminded myself. The coast of Cuba appeared, looking beautiful. I was glued to the window, getting my first glimpses of the forbidden land. I was fascinated by the lush greenery of the crops and the red soil. Everything looked so fertile. We flew over what looked like an abandoned airport, then a few minutes later descended towards a modern airport. There were a few sparse palm trees growing along the runway.. The last thing I want to do is lead you on; we've talked about that a lot." We have." And I don't want you to form any expectations I can't meet." Of course." But at the same time, I don't want you to bottle up your emotions. Doing that is only going to stress you out and lead to resentment, and I don't want you resenting me." For not returning my feelings?" And for not acknowledging them. I DO acknowledge them. I'm trying to tell you that I understand if you're in love with me. It's okay. I HAVE to be okay with it, because the alternative is losing you, and I don't want that."She practically swooned, new hope flaring into her eyes. "Losing me?" she asked carefully.I took a deep breath, gathering myself before I added any more fruitless hope to the situation. "You and I both have to come to terms with how you feel about me. I still don't think I deserve your love, if indeed that's what you feel for me. Look at me: I'm fucking a dozen different girls every day of the week. I'm the.
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